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Running
Feb 6, 2012 17:16:49 GMT -5
Post by celticthundergirl on Feb 6, 2012 17:16:49 GMT -5
Hey I'm kinda nervous here. This is my first story so I'm not sure what to expect. Please tell me the truth about it. If it's not good just say so. Criticism is always welcome because it helps me write better stories so, just tell me what you think. Please comment or give suggestions as well.
Part 1 He can’t catch me, he won’t! Always running. I was so tired of constantly running away. But he wouldn’t find me. He couldn’t. Now here I was dressed in boy’s clothes with my long hair tucked up under a baseball cap. I was hoping it would help keep me hidden from him. A few months ago, everything had been perfect. Going to school everyday, playing sports and music, riding horses, until… No don’t think about it, I told myself. Exhausted as I was, I must keep going. I had to find something to eat. Playing my fiddle helped me earn a few dollars every now and then but it wasn’t really enough. Inside the case I had put my most prized possessions; my parents’ wedding rings, my family Bible, and a little gold heart locket. It was the last thing my mother had given me before she died. Inside it was a picture of my parents on their wedding day. My mother had told me to put a picture of my wedding day in the other side someday, not that that was going to happen any time soon. At my heels, trotted a small puppy. I had found him wandering yesterday and he had followed me. Suddenly I heard that laugh! No, he couldn’t have found me! I picked up the puppy and ran. He hardly weighed anything. Pounding footsteps behind me echoed in my ears. Finally after running for what seemed like forever I stopped and listened…Nothing. I kept walking until I reached a parking lot filled with cars. There must be some kind of event going on inside, I thought to myself. I might as well wait here. There’ll be a lot of people. Maybe I can play for them after they’re done inside. I sat down against the wall to wait holding the puppy close. Hunger and fatigue must have caught up to me because soon, I was sound asleep. ~ Damian’s P.O.V. As the last line of Ireland’s Call rings out throughout the concert hall, I breathe a sigh of relief. Not that I don’t love performing, but it’s just that I’v been overly tired lately. George glances over at me and mouths, “Hang in there Damo.” I nod and then turn to smile and wave to the audience. Finally, after all the bows are taken, the smiles and waves over with, we head backstage to change. “I thought that was never going to end,” I sigh. “What’s the matter Damo? Tired of all the female attention?” teases Paul, wiggling his eyebrows at me. I roll my eyes at him. “Nah it’s not that, it’s just that he hasn’t gotten enough sleep lately, right Damo?” George puts in. I nod, “Yeah, let’s hurry up, I want to get theses Meet and Greets done so I can get to bed.” “I’m not gonna argue... but I don’t know about you but I’m hungry.” Keith states. Everyone groans. “Of course you are,” Ryan sighs. “You’d have the whole fridge empty in half an hour if Sharon let you. Just then Sharon walked in. “All right who has Meet and Greets tonight?” she asked. “Me and Damo,” Paul answers pointing at me. “Sharon, is there any way I could do it another night?” I ask hopefully. “Sorry Damian but I can’t switch last minute.” I sigh. Well this is definitely gonna be a long night. ~
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Running
Feb 6, 2012 19:09:35 GMT -5
Post by meg_cahill21 on Feb 6, 2012 19:09:35 GMT -5
interesting start, cant wait 2 see where this goes...update soon!!!
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Running
Feb 6, 2012 21:58:23 GMT -5
Post by celticthundergirl on Feb 6, 2012 21:58:23 GMT -5
Part 2
Damian's P.O.V About an hour and a half later, and I’m finally leaving the Meet and Greets with Paul. It’s been a really long night. I can’t wait to get to sleep. I thought. “C’mon Paul, let’s hurry, I’m starving and I need to get to sleep. It’s already like 8 o’clock.” Paul gave me a funny look. “Ok fine. I know 8 isn’t that late but when you’ve been up since 6 this morning because a certain somebody has to start off the fire alarm with his failed attempt at cooking breakfast… and when you haven’t eaten since noon, 8 feels pretty late.” “Hey, it wasn’t my fault that I don’t know how to make eggs. They burn pretty fast though…” “Hmph, I’ll say,” I replied annoyed. I pushed open the door and felt the cool night air hit my face. Suddenly I spied a shape leaning up against the wall of the building. I stopped short. “Hey Paul, what’s that?” It looked like a young boy. ~
Girl’s P.O.V.
Half awake, I heard voices talking over me. One voice spoke softly, “Poor lad looks worn out.” What does he mean lad? Oh… the disguise. I might as well go along with it. “Should we wake him up?” asked another. “Yeah we probably should.” I heard someone kneel down next to me and felt them shake my shoulder gently. Slowly I opened my eyes and looked up into the bluest eyes I had ever seen. He was probably seventeen or eighteen, about my age. The other man looked to be about 30 or so. I struggled to sit up, hiding the puppy behind me. “Who are you?” I asked quietly. The older one looked at me and said, “I’m Paul and this here is Damian,” he said pointing to the other guy. Could I trust them? They seem nice enough but I’d better not take any chances.“Let’s get you up and get you something to eat,” Paul said and reached down to help me up. “No, I’d rather stay here,” I said not wanting them to get in trouble because of me. I couldn’t put them in danger too. He might find them. “Are you sure?” Damian asked. “Are you waiting for someone? I shook my head no. “Just please leave me alone,” I said although that was the last thing I really wanted them to do. “But…” Damian started to say but then Paul put a hand on his shoulder and shook his head. “All right,” Paul said, “but be careful.” Then they turned and left leaving me all alone…again.
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Post by HburgEagle44 on Feb 7, 2012 1:05:14 GMT -5
Oh wow, this seems super interesting. I really like it. I have no criticism for you... o.O that's strange for me haha grammer nerd! But this is truly a great start, and I can't wait to see where it goes! Update?
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Post by celticbear on Feb 7, 2012 1:10:03 GMT -5
CTGirl! You are off to a great start. Love how you have the settiing to when Both Paul and Damo are still part of CT! Love how you had Paul burn the eggs and here I thought the only problem he had is with microwave Popcorn. LOOKING FORWARD TO SEE WHERE THIS STORY IS GOING! I'LL STICK WITH YOU TO THE END.
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Post by orinocoflow on Feb 7, 2012 3:23:15 GMT -5
update soon please!
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Post by meg_cahill21 on Feb 7, 2012 7:33:15 GMT -5
OMG!!! i wrote a story just like this like 2 yrs ago, only I never put it on here...anway, I cant wait 2 see what happens next!!! UPDATE SOON!!!
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Running
Feb 7, 2012 19:00:31 GMT -5
Post by celticthundergirl on Feb 7, 2012 19:00:31 GMT -5
Thanks for the comments. I'll try to have an update soon.
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Running
Feb 11, 2012 14:59:34 GMT -5
Post by celticthundergirl on Feb 11, 2012 14:59:34 GMT -5
Thanks for waiting guys. Hope you like this.
Part 3 Suddenly, about and hour later a noise startled me. What was that? Then He walked out of the shadows. I just knew it was him. It couldn’t be anyone else. “So, it looks like you didn’t listen did you?” He sneered. I managed to scramble to my feet the puppy in my arms. “I told you to leave me alone,” I screamed. “And why would I listen to you?” “Haven’t you already done enough to me? Who are you anyway?” I asked my voice shaking in anger. “Someone you won’t forget and No, it’s only beginning,” He snarled. “What have you got there?” He demanded. “None of your business.” He grabbed the puppy out of my arms and dropped her on the ground. Then he grabbed my arm and dug his fingers into it. I winced. ”Please stop. I can’t pay you. I told you I don’t have any money left!” I struggled to get away but he twisted my arm behind me until I thought it would come out of its socket. He slapped me in the face, no doubt leaving a hand print behind, and then threw me to the ground, my head slamming hard on the pavement. He kicked the puppy hard against the wall. “No!” I cried. “Don’t hurt her!” “Are you such a coward that you have to hurt a little puppy? Take out your anger on me if you have to. What did I ever do to you?” He started to kick me. One blow hit me so hard in the knee that I heard a pop. Another in the stomach knocked the wind right out of me. I was drifting into unconsciousness when I guess I imagined I heard someone yelling. ~
Damian’s Point of View
I can’t stop thinking of that poor boy we saw earlier. We never should have left him alone. There was something about him that I just couldn’t place but I had this sudden feeling that he was running from someone and that he was in danger. All the others were eating while I sat there thinking. “Paul, I have a bad feeling about that boy,” I whispered to the man sitting next to me. “I’m thinking that we shouldn’t have left him alone. “Oh he’s probably fine,” Paul replied. “As much as someone can be who looks like they haven’t eaten in a week,” I muttered under my breath. “What was that Damian?” Sharon asked. “Um nothing?” I replied. Paul gave me a funny look. “Well are you going to eat or just talk to yourself all night?” Sharon asked annoyed. I looked at Paul and gave a look saying that I was going whether he was or not. “Uh Sharon, we have to do something quick a minute,” I told her looking at Paul. He nodded. “Fine but hurry back we have a busy day tomorrow and I doubt you want to miss the desert,” Sharon said. “Desert!” Keith quickly piped in. “You two can stay away as long as you want, More for me then!” I rolled my eyes. “C’mon Paul,” I said looking at him. He slowly got up and followed me outside. We began walking towards the building where our concert had been a few hours ago. Suddenly, I heard a scream and I started running. I rounded the corner to see the kid on the ground and a man kicking him. “Hey you, Stop! What do you think you’re doing?” Paul yelled. “Leave him alone!” Then the guy took off, Paul hot on his heels. I knelt down beside the lad and looked at him. There was a handprint clearly outlined on his face and he was unconscious. Paul came jogging back. “I lost him,” he panted. “Well, lets take care of that kid. He causes more trouble than even you and we’ve known him for what, 3 hours?” he said shaking his head. I just glared at him and then I picked the kid up off the ground and started walking back to the bus without another look behind me to see if Paul was following. ~
Girl’s P.O.V.
Waking up, I felt myself being carried by someone. “No, please, leave me alone,” I managed to choke out. He couldn’t just take me without a fight. I wouldn’t let him. I struggled to get away but He just held on to me tighter. “Shhh,” I heard, “It’s just us remember? Damian? Paul’s here with me too.” At this, I relaxed and let them take me wherever they were going. “What is your name anyways?” Paul asked. “Umm Nick,” I replied thinking it wasn’t totally a lie. Then, held tight in Damian’s arms, I slowly fell asleep. ~
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Running
Feb 11, 2012 22:58:06 GMT -5
Post by celticbear on Feb 11, 2012 22:58:06 GMT -5
Wow! The Plot thickens! I wonder how much longer Nick can keep it secret that she is a girl from the others. I bet as soon as Sharon see's Nick she's going to know the truth! SHARON ALWAYS AS A WAY OF FINDING OUT THE TRUTH BEFORE THE OTHERS DO!
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Running
Feb 12, 2012 2:02:32 GMT -5
Post by HburgEagle44 on Feb 12, 2012 2:02:32 GMT -5
Ooh.... that was intense Poor 'Nick'... What's her name, Nicole? Update soon!!!!
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Running
Feb 12, 2012 16:11:42 GMT -5
Post by celticthundergirl on Feb 12, 2012 16:11:42 GMT -5
You'll find out her real name soon and thanks for reading. It means a lot.
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Running
Feb 24, 2012 12:27:01 GMT -5
Post by celticthundergirl on Feb 24, 2012 12:27:01 GMT -5
~Sorry it took me so long. I've been really busy. I''ll try to update sooner next time. Please comment! I'd like to know what you think and if I should keep going.~
The next thing I heard was voices talking. I slowly reached up and felt for my hat. Good still there. At least they don’t know I’m a girl. Slowly, I tried to get out of the bunk I was lying in but try as I did, I was just too weak and hurt. I let out a soft moan but immediately regretted it when the curtain around me was opened and Damian stood next to me looking down at me. “How’re ya feelin’ today?” he asked. I shrugged. “Not too bad.” He gave me a look as if to say Yeah right. “Wait a minute, where’s the puppy?” I asked. “She’s fine. A little banged up but she’s ok. We fed her earlier this morning. She’s outside waiting for you,” Daman replied. I nodded. “Thanks for taking care of her.” He nodded. “Well everyone’s waitin’ to meet ya’,” he said. “Who’s everyone?” I asked. He pulled back the curtain further to reveal 5 other guys sitting around a small room, all looking at me. “That’s George, Keith, Ryan, Neil, and of course Paul. You can’t forget him,” he said gesturing to each one as he talked. “How are you Nick?” asked George gently. I winced at the use of that name. I hated lying to them but it couldn’t be helped. Trying to look convincing, I replied, “Not too bad but I could be better. My arm and knee hurt the worst. " “That arm does look pretty bad,” George said gesturing to my left arm that was covered in colorful bruises. I knew it was bad but I didn’t want to make them worry. “We should get you fixed up,” Neil said looking at me pointedly. “No really it’s not that bad,” I replied starting to panic. They couldn’t, then they’d find out my secret. “You don’t look so good,” Ryan commented. “When was the last time you ate?” “Umm… about 3 days ago now I think.” “What!” Damian said angrily. “Didn’t you have anything?” “Well I did…but then I found the puppy and she was hungry…” “You gave all your food to a puppy?” Paul said wonderingly. I nodded. “She… needed it more than I did.” Nobody said anything until Ryan finally spoke. “I still think you should let us help you. You don’t want those cuts to get infected either,” he said referring to the cuts on my arms and face. “You can’t,” I insisted, really getting worried now. “Why not?” Damian asked quietly. He hadn’t said anything for a while but had just stood there listening to my protests. Did he know? “I…I just…Because….” I couldn’t see any way out of this and they did have a point. I didn’t want my cuts to get infected and I did hurt all over. I sighed, “Because… I’m not a boy,” I said muttering under my breath. “What did you say?” Keith spoke for the first time. “I said I’m not a boy,” I replied rather loudly this time. They all looked at me with stunned expressions on their faces. “Y-you mean you’re a girl,” Keith stuttered. “Well if I’m not a boy don’t you think I’m probably a girl?” I asked impatiently and rather sarcasticly. Nobody spoke for a moment until Paul said, “No wonder you freaked out when we tried to help you. What is your name then anyway?” Oh yeah, I had forgotten that little detail. “Annica,” I told him, “but some people call me Nick.” He nodded. George spoke up, “Paul, Keith, you go get Sharon and Phil. Neil, Ryan go find the rest of the girls and tell them what happened and to hurry back here. Damian you stay here. I’m going to go tell the driver we aren’t leaving for a while.” Everyone hurried to do as they were told. I just sat down on the couch. After they were gone, Damian came and sat beside me. He looked at me for a moment and then shook his head. “This certainly explains a whole lot,” he said to himself. “Why didn’t you tell us at the beginning?” he asked quietly. “I’d rather not say just yet. I have a feeling I’ll be doing a lot of explaining later and it’s a long story.” He nodded. “Count on it.” ~
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Running
Feb 24, 2012 19:22:21 GMT -5
Post by CelticPrincess24 on Feb 24, 2012 19:22:21 GMT -5
This is really good. I can't wait to find out what happens next!
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Running
Feb 24, 2012 22:55:22 GMT -5
Post by celticbear on Feb 24, 2012 22:55:22 GMT -5
Knew she could not keep the secret for to much longer. LOVE HOW GOOD OLD GEORGE TOOK CHARGED AND NO BODY ARGUED WITH HIM! THIS IS GOING TO BE SOME MEETING BETWEEN ANNICA,SHARON AND PHIL!
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