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Post by meg_cahill21 on Oct 25, 2012 5:51:47 GMT -5
okay, so u are probably wondering what happened to the story? well, i deleted it. my reasons for deleting it is that i didnt like the angle that i was going at and i liked this other idea for colm better and ya...i'l start the revised version of this either later today or sometime this weekend and i'll try to have it posted by next week. the new revised version of this story is going to be INSANE different from what i originally had. sorry for all of you who were reading the original version of this, but i just didnt like it. so, hope you guys like what i've come up with! -meaghan
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Post by meg_cahill21 on Oct 25, 2012 18:13:56 GMT -5
Chapter 1 Reilly
“Christine, when we get off of this boat I am going to kill you.” I hissed as I lugged my luggage up the ramp to the cruise ship. “Trust me, after this cruise, you will be thanking me.” My best friend who literally dragged me by the ear to this thing said as she pulled me up the ramp. “Chris! I have hockey training! How am I expected to make the Olympic team if I’m spending almost a month on some stupid boat with those stupid singers that you are obsessed with?” I all but yelled. “Will you just chill with the hockey thing? Why is making this team so important to you?” “You know why.” I said darkly, beyond upset that she would even bring THAT reason up. “Fine, I do know why. But your whole life has been eat, sleep, hockey. You need a break. You need time to relax! You’re mother, heck even you coach agrees with me! And what coach of a D1 school decides to give his captain a break? NONE! So, what does that tell you?” Christine reasoned. “That you best hope there is at least a gym on this thing or else I’m gonna jump off the boat and swim home. I don’t care if we are in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean!” I stated as I was pushed into line to check in. “You really should have gone out for the arts instead of hockey miss drama queen.” Christine muttered. “Shut up.” I grumbled. As we got closer to the check-in, Christine started to squeal. Looking in her direction so I could see what made her so excited, I inwardly groaned. Six guys were sitting at a table taking pictures, signing papers, and checking people in. “Those must be the idiots that started this whole cruise crap in the first place.” I thought as I moved up so I was facing all six men. “Hey there lassie, what’s your name?” The overly cheerful blond one asked. “Reilly. Is there a gym on this thing?” I asked, getting straight to the point. They looked taken back as the blond one answered, “Yeah, lower deck.” But by that point, I was already walking in. I could vaguely here in the background one of the guys ask Christine, “What’s with her?” I smirked, knowing that they wouldn’t find out for even though I was on a cruise ship, I would still be in training, and no one, not even six hot guys were going to distract me.
*first part of the new story! hope you guys like this! and dont worry, the lads will be heavily involved in this and it wont just be hockey hockey hockey...sadly...lol. comment and let me know what you think of this and if i should continue or go back to my original idea cuz i still have the other story save if you want it! thanks!*
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Post by celticbear on Oct 25, 2012 20:42:58 GMT -5
This new version is okay! But I say pick a different title for the first one and continue it!
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Post by meg_cahill21 on Oct 25, 2012 21:10:36 GMT -5
CB: so redo the other story under a new title? or just get rid of this one?
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Post by celticbear on Oct 25, 2012 22:03:25 GMT -5
Keep the new one with this title. Re post the old version under a new title. In other words put both versions on here.
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Post by meg_cahill21 on Nov 1, 2012 9:35:30 GMT -5
1. Reilly
I love people’s reactions when they first meet me. Sure, I should probably be offended by some of the things they say and the looks I get from some, but instead I usually just laugh in their face and walk away. What can I say, I’m my own person. Only one reaction to someone meeting me has ever put a dent in my self-esteem and made me feel weird, awkward, and out of place. And it was the reaction I experienced this morning with the six guys on the deck, particularly the one with the gorgeous blue-green eyes and short brown hair. He looked at me as if I was some regular girl with a psychopathic problem or something. And that was a first for me. Usually I just get snubbed or told I am rude, but never once was I looked at and treated as if I was crazy, and it hurt, seeing it from him. “Reilly, please tell me you don’t plan on spending every day in the gym?” Christine asked as I laced up my Nike sneakers, trying to push away my thoughts on the man and his reaction to me. “What else do you expect me to do? I can’t stand their music so it’s not like I’m gonna sit and listen to them and I need to stay in tip-top shape if I even want to think of having a shot for the Olympic team next year!” I explained as I grabbed my iPod and its iHome. “Come on Reilly, this is supposed to be a fun trip to get you to relax and to take a break before you run your body into the ground!” Christine tried to reason. “I won’t run my body into the ground, chillax, I know what I’m doing, I’ve been doing this since I was ten and I’m still here aren’t i? I’ll be fine. You go and enjoy those Irish people while I go and workout. Love ya!” I called out as I walked through the door. “But Reilly!” My best friend’s voice got droned out as I made my way down to the lower deck where the gym was. Paying too much attention to the signs on the walls so I could see where I was heading, it took me by surprise when my body collided with another. “I’m sooo sorry!” I exclaimed as I looked up. My breath got caught in my throat as I realized it was the guy from the check-in table, one of the singers. The one who’s been on my mind from the moment I saw his face. “I take it you’re heading to the gym.” The words flowed from his mouth beautifully as I became memorized by his accent. ‘Snap out of it Reilly!’ My head screamed as I managed to say the one word that had so many meanings, “Yes.” “This is a cruise ship and your main focus is to be in a gym? Are you sure you’re alright?” He may have meant it as a joke, but it stung either way…though I don’t know why. “I have to stay in shape.” Was my blunt answer. “Don’t tell me you’re one of those girls who focuses more on body image than there actual self!” He scoffed, his eyes wandering up and down my body. “No, I am an athlete and I need to stay in shape for the upcoming season and because I have a very good shot at being asked to try-out for an Olympic team. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go.” I stated hotly, my Irish temper starting to come out. If there is one thing you need to know about me, it’s that you DO NOT mess with me under any circumstances and call me a prissy girly-girl. The man stood there in shock as I walked away. I don’t think he expected the answer I was going to give him.
Colm I’m not usually one to judge people, but if I was, I would have to say that that girl was flat out crazy. Almost a whole month on a cruise ship and she was more focused on working out in a gym that in my opinion shouldn’t even be considered a gym with it’s one treadmill and a few weights. Only now do I get it, as she told me that she had a shot to be asked to be on an Olympic team. It all made sense and I suddenly felt bad for making such quick accusations against her. I took in her appearance the best I could as she explained all that to me and I could definitely notice the defined muscles in her calves (she was wearing shorts), the slim but strong body shape, and the shirt that she was wearing. Boston University Hockey. She was a hockey player. Well, that explains the short temper and sharp tongue, I thought as I watched her storm away from me. I quickly took back my thought though as I remembered the last time I was too quick to judge her…I was way off. Shaking my head trying to erase what had just occurred, I went back to my current task of looking for Rebecca Harkin and Emmet Cahill so we could practice for our performances during the cruise. An hour and a half into rehearsals and I still couldn’t shake that girl out of my head. It was like she was haunting me, or like she was kidnapping my mind and invading it. I couldn’t escape from those chocolate brown eyes and dark, voluminous brown hair that was held back in elastic with little pieces falling around her eyes. I couldn’t help but think of the word ‘beauty’ when the picture of her entered my mind. The thought of her was like my own personal drug and it was causing me to go off task, to take my mind away to someplace else. “COLM!” The sharp tongue brought me back to reality. “I didn’t do it!” I quickly exclaimed, thinking of the first response that came to my mind. “I know you didn’t do it for if you did we wouldn’t be waiting patiently for you to finish the song.” Sharon Browne, my manager, stated as she all but shot fire at me through her stony blue eyes. “Sorry…sorry. Um, where were we?” I questioned, feeling slightly embarrassed as I noticed Emmet and Rebecca holding back laughter out of the corner of my eye. “Oh my…Everybody, take a break and bring in Keith! I can’t work with this right now. Colm, I suggest you take this break to find your head since you seem to have lost it.” That did it for Emmet and Rebecca, they burst out laughing. “Yes ma’am.” I said sullenly as I shot a look at my two friends. When we were excused, I quickly bolted to the gym. I was going to find out more about the girl who has stolen my mind…and possibly heart.
*okay, so im not planning on making this some lovey-dovey story. But, one of the reasons i started this and am writing this this way is because i wanna focus on character development and writing out emotions of my characters and all that good stuff. So, please review and bear with me on this...experiment. hope it turns out good. thanks for reading!*
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Post by laurenne on Nov 2, 2012 17:14:32 GMT -5
I love it so far. More soon, please.
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Post by celticbear on Nov 2, 2012 20:33:58 GMT -5
Love how Riley has Colm so flustered that he could not get through rehearsals! And because of it, Rebecca and Emmet got a good laugh! Sharon got a wee bit peeved and called for Keith! Still say you need to repost the first version under an different title!
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Post by meg_cahill21 on Nov 30, 2012 9:41:40 GMT -5
2. Colm
It took me no time to find her, even though I barely knew where the gym was. The loud music that was spewing out words that astonished me weren’t be shut off my both the passengers and crew was like my own personal yellow brick road. The only difference, I had a feeling that I was heading to someone so much better than the wizard of Oz. The closer I got to her, the more my ears rang and buzzed. How one could listen to this music was beyond me. When I finally reached her, I subconsciously stood out of view as I watched her through the window. She was running on the treadmill, the shirt that she had on earlier thrown to the ground and in its place was a black sports bra. She was facing towards me so I was able to clearly see her washboard abs, something I never really pictured a girl having. She looked so concentrated, so into the zone that I couldn’t help but admire her dedication to achieving her goal. As I watched her sprint on the machine to keep up with its highest spend and elevation, I debated on whether or not I should go into the mini gym and interrupt her workout just so I could hear her voice speak to me again. I made my mind in what seemed like not even a full second as I watched her jump off the machine and onto the side rails of it. As I made my way towards the door, I was stopped as I noticed that she hopped back onto the treadmill, which in my opinion was moving at the speed of lightening. Shocked that not once she didn’t lose her footing and didn’t fall off, I resumed my former task of observing her. Her face was one of a broken angel. It had all the beauty in the world, but it was mutilated by the multiple scars and a nose that I could guess had been broken at least three times. I felt a pang of sympathy as I realized how those injuries must have hurt. But why did she have them? Clearly girls’ hockey isn’t that violent. In my opinion though, she was the definition of beauty. I barely knew this girl, yet I was so infatuated with her that I was shocked. Never have I ever fallen for a girl this hard and this fast. Never have I fallen for a girl before I even knew her name. The thought of that shocked me as I suddenly felt my feet pulling me into another direction. With my arm extending on its own, my hand involuntarily grasped the handle of the door, and turned it.
Reilly I could have killed him. Not only did he interrupt my workout, but he scared the living daylights out of me, which caused me to lose my concentration and that resulted in me being ejected from the moving machine. Feeling the skin being ripped from my stomach and knees, I could barely hold back my tears as he rushed to shut the treadmill off. “Oh my gosh, I am so sorry. I didn’t mean to frighten you like that.” He rushed so quickly that I could barely understand him with his thick accent. “It’s fine, just help me up.” I grunted in pain, tears stinging in my eyes. I refused to let them fall, not in front of this man at least. “I think you should get these cuts looked at so they don’t get infected.” He informed me as he sat me down on the only chair in the room and started to wipe away the blood from the knees. I could sense that the felt extremely awkward being so close to me with me in so little clothing, but I couldn’t help but get a small fluttering feeling in my stomach every time that he touched me, when his breath hit my cut up and badly bruised knee. I couldn’t shake this feeling that I got when I was with him, even though I have only really been with him twice. It was a different feeling and it scared me. All my life, I have been thinking hockey, hockey, hockey. And all my life I only had one thing on my mind: receiving that Olympic gold. But within these past twenty-four hours, my whole mindset has changed and this man has been one of the only things on my mind. The thought made me shudder in disbelief. I didn’t even know his name and he was all I could think about. “Are you okay?” The man asked, taking me away from my thoughts. “Yeah, I’ll be fine. A little bit sore but fine. Thank you for helping me, even though it was your fault.” I pointed out, laughing my injury off like I always did. Ever since I was a little girl, I refuse to show anybody that I was in pain or that I needed help because I did not want to look weak in front of others. I refused to be that dainty, easily broken, fragile girl. And to this day, that is how I lived by. No one was allowed to take care of me and no one was allowed to see me hurt. So why was I letting this stranger break all my views? “Right, sorry I startled you. I guess I just wasn’t thinking.” “No you weren’t. Anyway, thanks for semi-cleaning me up.” I said as I stood up to leave. “Uh, sure, no problem.” He stuttered, turning a bright shade of red. “Well, I guess that I’ll be heading off now. Thanks again.” As I turned to leave, I felt the grasp of his warm hand on my wrist holding me back. My stomach erupted with butterflies as I listened to his voice ask me, “What’s your name?” The tough girl in me came out as I said, “Why do you care?” “So I know what to call you on our date tonight at seven on the top deck.” He said so smoothly without missing a beat that my mouth dropped open in shock. I could tell very quickly that he was an athlete like myself because I have only known athletes to use that kind of pick-up line so quickly and so smoothly. Plus, they were the only ones with a big enough ego to even try it on a girl. “Looks like you’re gonna have to find someone else for that date buddy, cause I’m not interested.” Lie. He let go of my wrist in surprise, shock written a million times on his face as I turned him down. Taking the opportunity to flee the situation before I did lose all self-control and agree to meet him, I turned and left, limping because of the pain that was radiating throughout my whole body from my cuts. “But, for future reference, my name is Reilly.” I called behind me just after I walked through the open door.
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Post by celticbear on Nov 30, 2012 19:15:51 GMT -5
This is one tough lady! But I have faith that Colm can win Reily over!
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Post by meg_cahill21 on Mar 21, 2013 20:19:26 GMT -5
3. Colm
Three days later and I have not seen or heard from Reilly, which I didn’t necessarily get considering we were on a boat and there was nowhere for her to really go that would create such a distance. Three days later and thoughts of Reilly were still cluttering up my mind. “Colm, Colm, COLM!” Rebecca Harkin’s shrieking voice pulled me from my flashback of the other day when I was helping Reilly after she got hurt. “Sorry Bec, what’s up?” “Well I was going to ask if you wanted to work on our duet for the performance tomorrow night, but obviously you’re still hung up on that girl.” Rebecca stated. I smiled sheepishly. Rebecca was the only one who I confided in about Reilly and my sudden attachment to her. “I just can’t get her out of my head Bec, and to make matters worse I haven’t seen her in three days!” “First off,” Rebecca started, “you are starting to sound a little obsessive. And two, being the best friend that I am, I found out what room she’s staying in so you can go see her.” My head turned so quickly that I am surprised I didn’t break my neck. “What? Where? How?” I managed to get out as fast as I could. Laughing, the younger red haired girl said, “I ran into that girl she checked in with the first day and asked her. She’s staying in 21B. But Colm before you go you should know that…” Rebecca’s voice droned out the farther I got away from her as I got up and all but acted like a tornado as I rushed to Reilly’s room. When I got to my destination, I paused to catch my breath before knocking on the door. “UGH! Christine if you forgot your room card again I swear I’m gonna…What are you doing here?” My eyes suddenly went from staring at the white of the door to the girl I had been obsessing over the past three days. “I uh…” My mind could not come up with a good enough excuse under the pressure of her glaring hazel eyes. “I just wanted to see how you were feeling after your fall the other day?” I lamely finished. “I’m fine. Goodbye.” She said sharply, starting to shut the door. I was too quick for her as I stuck my foot in the crack-not my best idea, I would later come to realize as the force of her pushing the door all but crushed my foot, and questioned, “Have you been crying?” Her eyes widened as she said a little too quickly, “No.” But her voice gave out on her as it cracked. Her force on the door suddenly loosened up and I was able to walk into the compartment without applying any force. Looking at Reilly, I could see that fresh tears were starting to form in her already bloodshot eyes. “Reilly, what’s going on? Are you in pain? Do I need to get the doctor?” I questioned as I gestured towards her poorly bandaged legs that were visible in her very short cotton pajama shorts. “No, my, my legs are fine.” “Then what is it?” I asked. When she said nothing, I finally noticed her appearance. Plaid pajama shorts, ripped sweatshirt that was one size too big, socks, and her hair was thrown sloppily on top of her head. She looked nothing like the tough, athletic girl that had been invading my mind nonstop. Instead she looked so weak and vulnerable. “Nothing that concerns you, so please just leave.” She all but cried. “Reilly I will not go until you tell me what is going on.” I said gently but firmly. “My, my, brother…my mom...I got the call the other day…” Fresh tears started to pour down her cheeks. Not knowing what to do, I just stood there completely clueless as to what to do as the now sobbing girl in front of me managed to stutter, “My brother was killed.” As soon as the words were out she threw herself into my arms and cried.
*i am back....sorry for the long delay, but when your playing varsity hockey that requires all of your time...but thats now over and i will be getting back into the swing of things hopefully....depends on softball haha...anyway, review! all opinions good bad and ugly welcomed! thanks! sorry again for the delay!
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Post by celticbear on Mar 21, 2013 21:06:42 GMT -5
Worth The Wait Meg! Poor Riley loosing her brother! Love how she chose in the end to lean on Colm! Hope Colm knows what to say and do!
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Post by LoveCT on May 31, 2014 22:42:54 GMT -5
Woah.
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